 These engineering and science tech-centric
jokes, song parodies, anecdotes and assorted humor have been collected from friends
and websites across the Internet. I check back occasionally for new fodder, but
it seems all the old content is reappearing all over (like this is). The humor is
light-hearted and clean and sometimes slightly assaultive to the easily-offended,
so you are forewarned. It is all workplace-safe.
Humor #1,
#2, #3
For those who thought the hardest part of
Physics 101 was the constant conversion from MKS or CGS units to English units, here are some useful English
system conversions.
- Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter: Eskimo Pi
- 2000 pounds of Chinese soup: Won ton
- 1 millionth of a mouthwash: 1 microscope
-
Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement: 1 bananosecond
- Weight an evangelist carries with God: 1 billigram
- Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour: Knot-furlong
- 365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer because it's less filling: 1 lite year
- 16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone: 1 Rod Serling
- Half of a large intestine: 1 semicolon
- 1000 aches: 1 megahurtz
- Basic unit of laryngitis: 1 hoarsepower
- Shortest distance between two jokes: A straight line (think about it for a moment)
- 2000 mockingbirds: two kilomockingbirds
- 1 kilogram of falling figs: 1 Fig Newton
- 1000 grams of wet socks: 1 literhosen
- 1 trillion pins: 1 terrapin
- 2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital: 1 I.V. League
- 100 Senators: Not 1 decision
...thanks to Steve for this one, too. |