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Engineering & Science Humor - RF CafeThese engineering and science tech-centric jokes, song parodies, anecdotes and assorted humor have been collected from friends and websites across the Internet. I check back occasionally for new fodder, but it seems all the old content is reappearing all over (like this is). The humor is light-hearted and clean and sometimes slightly assaultive to the easily-offended, so you are forewarned. It is all workplace-safe.

Humor #1, #2, #3

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  • The Hospital Ambulance = A Cab, I Hustle to Help Man
  • Semolina = Is No Meal
  • The United States of America = Attaineth its cause, freedom
  • Christmas tree = Search, Set, Trim
  • A Gentleman = Elegant Man
  • Presbyterian = Best In Prayer
  • The Public Art Galleries = Large Picture Halls, I Bet
  • A Decimal Point = I'm a Dot in Place
  • The Earthquakes = That Queer Shake
  • Salman Rushdie = Read, Shun Islam
  • Martin Scorsese = Screen is a storm

    (the director of movies "Taxi Driver," "Mean Streets," "GoodFellas," "Cape Fear," and "Age of Innocence.")

  • Barbie doll = I'll bare bod / Babe I'd roll / Liberal bod
  • Student Information Processing Board = Computation Transgression Forbidden (MIT)
  • Statue of Liberty = Built to Stay Free
  • Eleven plus two = Twelve plus one
  • Patrick Stewart = A Crap Trek Twist
  • Mel Gibson = Bong Smile
  • Admirer = Married
  • Indomitableness = Endless ambition
  • New York Times = Monkeys Write / Monkey Writes
  • David Letterman = Nerd Amid Late TV
  • Howard Stern = Retard Shown
  • Contradiction = Accord not in it
  • Debit card = Bad Credit
  • Why shouldn't America go re-elect President Clinton in Ninety-Six? = He has a prime or cunning tendency to wildly solicit Internet sex.
  • Spiro Agnew = Grow a Spine (also, spine can be anagrammed into another body part)
  • William Clinton = I'm it, an ill clown

    William Jefferson Clinton = Firm clean fellow. Joint? Sin!

  • William Jefferson Clinton = Jail Mrs. Clinton: Felon wife
  • George Bush = He bugs Gore
  • Ronald Reagan = A darn long era
  • Raiders of the Lost Ark = Ford, the Real Star, is OK
  • The Towering Inferno = Not Worth Fire Engine
  • Prince of Tides = PS. I Cried Often

    Silence of the Lambs = Con Bites Male Flesh

  • Tony Blair, MP = I'm Tory plan B
  • Margaret Thatcher = A charm tart, get her!
  • Twenty thousand leagues under the sea = Huge water tale stuns. End had you tense.
  • The end of the world is nigh! = Down this hole, frightened!
  • The best things in life are free = Nail-biting refreshes the feet
  • "That's one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind." Neil A. Armstrong = A thin man ran; makes a large stride; left planet, pins flag on moon! On to Mars!
  • Do an angry hit = Tonya Harding
  • Grace'n any rink = Nancy Kerrigan
  • Pre-natal = Parental = Paternal

 

 

       ...from the www.wordsmith.org web site.